Posts Tagged ‘relationships’

My 2010 To Do List


2009
12.24


Here is the list of 10 things I will do with regard to dat­ing in 2010. 2009 has been some­what of a rough year so I wish and aim to make 2010 a more pos­i­tive year. The goal of this list is to make sure these goals are track-able and can be reviewed to see if they are suc­cess­ful or not through­out the year. I expect you to hold me account­able as I try to hold myself accountable.

1) End the use of ehar​mony​.com when my sub­scrip­tion expires in January/February. I have been on this site for 18+ months and met some very nice peo­ple and even dated a hand­ful of ladies. I am burned out no longer actively engaged in fol­low­ing the ehar­mony process (trans­la­tion burned out), so I must move on and try some­thing new.

2) Engage in one social activ­ity per week. This means get­ting out to a party, happy hour, con­cert, net­work­ing event … some­thing that is social and out among old and new friends.

3) Try a new online dat­ing source as they become more and more pos­si­ble. Chem​istry​.com is a lead­ing con­tender at the cur­rent time.

4) Take one class that will fur­ther engage me in a social atmos­phere. I am think­ing about either a cook­ing class or per­haps a dance (salsa) class.

5) Try speed dat­ing one time.

6) Con­tinue to more actively post entries on this blog regard­ing my dat­ing life. This has turned into a great source of ther­apy for myself.

7) Join a movie reviewing/movie view­ing club to first grow my inter­est in movies and also to attempt to meet other peo­ple ladies inter­ested in the same thing.

8 ) Con­tinue to par­tic­i­pate in promis­ing social sport­ing activies (soc­cer, yoga) which lend them­selves to gen­uine meetings.

9) Trust my instincts with regards to red flags and warn­ing signs when (attempt­ing to) dat­ing someone.

10) Try to release all worry about meet­ing some­one and do my best not to dwell on cur­rent cir­cum­stances and develop a more pos­i­tive out­look. (This will by far be the most dif­fi­cult and hard­est to track).

What do we think? Any more I should add to the list? Meet me in the com­ments section.

Dating a Short Guy


2009
11.18

I have never imag­ined that I would date a guy who was shorter than 5’11″. Since I started dat­ing, all of my boyfriends have been taller than me, and I have been able to wear heels with no issues of tow­er­ing over them. I have met a won­der­ful guy, and we are both attracted to one another. The only prob­lem is that he’s short. He says he is 5’9″, and I’m 5’7″, but I looked in the mir­ror when we were at this party, and I don’t know if it was my hair, but I looked way taller than him. This is with me wear­ing flat boots!

One of my friends is super short, and his girl­friend is my height, and they seem cute together. He wanted to date me, but I was so hung up on height that I didn’t go there. Now I see how he treats his girl­friend like a queen, and I won­der if that would have been me. I never imag­ined that I would be in this posi­tion. Lik­ing a guy who is way too short for me. I love my heels too much, and I don’t know if I could let them go.

I remem­ber one time I went out with a guy who said he was 5’6, but it felt like he was only 5’4. We had a great time, but I couldn’t let go on how short he was.

This is one of my issues. I am way too picky and every­thing turns me off. Should I not even go there with this guy cause he is short? Or should I just give it a go?

Has any girls dated shorter guys? Was it awk­ward? Did you have to sac­ri­fice your heels? Guys, would you date a girl who is taller than you?

Photo Detail:  too tall, orig­i­nally uploaded by dar­go­dargo.


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Why Is it So Hard to Find Someone Special to Date?


2009
11.17

I’ve come to the real­iza­tion that every­one around is either dat­ing, engaged, or mar­ried. The only one who remains alone is me. I don’t even under­stand why I do remain alone. The worst is when some­one says, “You are quite the catch. I can’t believe you are still sin­gle.” Well that makes the two of us.

My friend, who began dat­ing the guy she is with at the same time I started dat­ing my last failed attempt of hav­ing a rela­tion­ship, just told me news that shows that her rela­tion­ship is pro­gress­ing. Even though I didn’t want to, I felt jeal­ous. Why didn’t it work for me? Why doesn’t it ever work for me? I don’t know if it ever will. I really don’t. I seem to be cursed when it comes to love.

It seems like the more pas­sion­ate you are, the more alone you are. It just seems to be the case for some unknown rea­son. I’m really tired of feel­ing this way. It’s been years since I felt like I was with some­one, and I don’t under­stand why it’s so hard for me and so easy for others.

I hon­estly wish some­one would tell me what I am doing wrong cause I don’t know.

Photo Detail: Walk­ing Alone, orig­i­nally uploaded by Chris­t­ian Carocca.

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Don’t judge me because my mom and I aren’t close!


2009
11.13
I just cant get along with her.

I just can’t get along with her.

I recently read an arti­cle that talked about how Michelle Obama gave woman dat­ing advice on how to find a good man. One of the points she made was pay close atten­tion to how a young man treats his mom. This got me to think­ing about an ongo­ing debate I have with a few of my female friends who are in the dating/courting process.

It is a fact that myself and my mom are not shall we say the clos­ests. I rarely share very per­sonal things with her and we may talk once a week. Due to fam­ily events, we have no choice but to stay in touch but I wouldn’t say we are close. In fact, it is a chore to speak with her at times and there just has never been that warm fuzzy feel­ing. When I was younger, my mom and I would get into numer­ous argu­ments and I ended up on pun­ish­ment many, many times. Other times, my mom would be “selec­tive” in terms of which mes­sages I would get from my friends. The selec­tive­ness was due to the race of the per­son call­ing me. Of course, this infu­ri­ated me. Sim­ple as that. One time, my mom didn’t approve of a young lady I was dat­ing and we ended up not speak­ing for a year and a half which coin­cided with the length of time I was dat­ing this young lady. When I say we didn’t talk, I mean I saw her for the Christ­mas hol­i­days and that was the only time we talked. No phone calls or any­thing for 540 days. Of course I played a role in this, but the fact is that we just aren’t that close.

Would you judge me because of this? I would hope not. Many times I am wary of even intro­duc­ing my mom to poten­tial young ladies I may date. I have seen it time and time again just ruin the whole dynamic because my mother is just a tough per­son to get along with and get to know on a gen­uine level. Keep that in mind when I don’t talk about my mom often or speak in length about our his­tory before you do get a chance to meet her. I say all this to remind you not to judge me because my mom and I aren’t close. You could be dis­miss­ing a good thing for a poor reason.

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Realize I’m Lucky That Men Adore Me


2009
11.06
I felt a lit­tle down when things ended with the guy I was dat­ing. How­ever, I real­ized that all I can do is keep on trekking. My eHar­mony sub­scrip­tion has finally run out, and I didn’t renew it. The last day of my sub­scrip­tion the last guy I was dat­ing mes­saged me. We have been chat­ting non­stop ever since. He is just as con­nected as I am, which I like. It’s not like it has been with the past cou­ple of guys I have dated who don’t know how to text or send email. He has kids, like I do.
There is also another guy. I met him while out with my guy friend. He seems sweet, and we had a ball that night. We are sup­pose to go to din­ner on Sat­ur­day, so I real­ized some­thing. I never have issues find­ing guys, so I need to be happy that I at least have a pool of guys I can date. Maybe one day, one of them will turn into some­thing more.


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