Posts Tagged ‘can we still be friends’

Can Lovers Be Friends?


2009
10.19

My friend told me that even though her ex and her broke up, they are still great friends. I wish that I could claim the same. My ex and I no longer talk. When I tried to be friends with him, he tells me that “he doesn’t see the point because we don’t have much in com­mon.” It hurt because how can you spend almost four years with some­one, and then say that you don’t have much in common?

I some­times wish that we would never have got­ten back together the last time because we would still be friends. He was the one who I con­fided in, and he was the per­son who would give me the best advice. I don’t have that any­more. I thought we had things in com­mon: we loved trav­el­ing, fine cui­sine, wine, sports, etc. I guess he didn’t see it that way.

I think that he some­times says those things because he wants me to for­get him, so I can be happy. I asked him if he thought about me at all, and he said he didn’t want to dis­cuss those things because then tend to get seri­ous, and he can’t deal with that right now. I just want to be friends, and I guess I can’t even have that.

I guess my guy friend is right. Women tend to always want to be friends with their exes, while guys can’t han­dle that. They need to not have any con­tact, so they can move on. I guess I need to accept that and under­stand that I will never see or speak to him again. It’s just sad that we can’t be adults.